My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 25

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When the soul is anchored to the will of God and His exceeding great and precious promises,

with the calm unwavering confidence that His power and love are behind us

and never fail us until all His will for us is accomplished,

our life must be victorious.

In the center of the whirlpool,

while the water rushed around,

there’s a space of perfect stillness,

though with turmoil it is bound:

All is calm, and all is quiet,

scarcely e’en a sense of sound.

So with us – despite the conflict –

when in Christ His Peace is found.

-Springs In The Valley

Commit thy way unto the Lord,

trust also in Him;

and He shall bring it to pass.

Psalm 37:5

Roll upon Jehovah thy way;

trust upon Him:

and He worketh.

Young Translation

“He worketh.”

When?

Now.

We are so in danger of postponing our expectation of His acceptance of the trust,

and His undertaking to accomplish what we ask Him to do,

instead of saying as we commit. “He worketh.”

He worketh even now;

and praise Him that it is so.

The very expectancy enables the Holy Spirit to do the very thing we have rolled upon Him.

It is out of our reach.

We are not trying to do it anymore.

“HE WORKETH!”

-Streams In The Desert

God is not concerned about our plans;

He does not say – Do you want to go through this bereavement; this upset?

He allows these things for His own purpose.

The things we are going through are either making us sweeter, better, nobler men and women;

or they are making us more captious and fault-finding, more insistent upon our own way.

The things that happen either makes us fiends or they make us saints;

it depends entirely upon the relationship we are in to God.

If we say – “Thy will be done,”

we get the consolation of John 17,

the consolation of knowing that our Father is working according to His own wisdom.

When we understand what God is after we will not get mean and cynical.

Jesus has prayed nothing less for us

than absolute oneness with Himself

as He was one with the Father.

Some of us are far off it,

and yet God will not leave us alone until we are one with Him,

because Jesus has prayed that we might be.

-Oswald Chambers

My Utmost For His Highest

Thank You God, for this new day.

Thank You for these devotional readings that point me to You.

Every morning You give me something that reminds me that I am not alone.

You are with me every step of this journey.

Yes, there are difficult moments.

The tears fall.

I shout at the world.

I shout at him.

WHY?

Then I come back to the heart of it all.

YOU ARE WITH ME.

Nothing touches me that doesn’t go through You first.

You have allowed this for Your purpose.

I don’t begin to understand this,

but I trust that You are working out Your plan for my life.

HE WORKETH!

And so I will praise!

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 24

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Day 24

Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John,

and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men,

they marvelled;

and they took knowledge of them,

that they had been with Jesus.

Acts 4:13

Can others see when I have been with Jesus?

Lord, Can others see You in me?

I am not what I once was, but I am not yet what You created me to be.

This has rocked my world.

Nothing is as I thought it would be.

But I trust in You.

I trust in Your plan for me.

And now, there is more work to be done.

Show me how to live this life I’ve been given.

Be with our family.

Walk with us through this dark valley.

I pray for strength and endurance for each of us.

Give us eyes to see Your hand at work in our lives each and every day.

God You are so good to us!

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 23

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Day 23

I cried unto God with my voice, even unto God with my voice;

and He gave ear unto me.

In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord:

my sore ran in the night, and ceased not:

my soul refused to be comforted.

I remembered God, and was troubled:

I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed.

Selah

Thou holdest mine eyes waking:

I am so troubled that I cannot speak.

I have considered the days of old, the years of ancient times.

I call to remembrance my song in the night:

I commune with mine own heart:

and my spirit made diligent search.

Will the Lord cast off forever?

And will He be favorable no more?

Is His mercy clean gone forever?

Doth His promise fail for evermore?

Hath God forgotten to be gracious?

Hath He in anger shut up His tender mercies?

Selah

And I said,

This is my infirmity:

but I will remember the years of the right hand of the most high.

I will remember the works of the Lord:

surely I will remember Thy wonders of old.

I will meditate also of all Thy work, and talk of Thy doings.

Thy way, O God, is in the sanctuary:

who is so great a God as our God?

Thou art the God that doest wonders:

Thou hast declared Thy strength among Thy people.

Thou hast with Thine arm redeemed Thy people,

the sons of Jacob and Joseph.

Selah

The waters saw Thee, O God, the waters saw Thee;

they were afraid:

 the depths also were troubled.

The clouds poured out water:

the skies sent out a sound:

Thine arrows also went abroad.

The voice of Thy thunder was in the heaven:

 the lightnings lightened the world:

the earth trembled and shook.

Thy way is in the sea,

and Thy path in the great waters,

and Thy footsteps are not known.

Thou leddest Thy people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

Psalm 77

“I call to remembrance my song in the night,”

Lord, I thank You for the songs You give me.

Just the right message at just the right time!

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 22

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Day 22

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes;

and there shall be no more death,

neither sorrow, nor crying,

neither shall there be any more pain:

for the former things are passed away.

Revelation 21:4

Lots of tears today.

It started as I was driving into church.

I passed Jason on his church bus route and the tears came.

Then in church every time someone would hug me, the tears came.

Effie sat beside me and cried with me.

Thank You Lord, for this dear friend.

When I came home Ms. Pepper and I took a ride on the Gator back to the woods, the tears came.

But I also had such a sense of peace in the woods.

Olin and I enjoyed riding through the woods in Missouri.

He wasn’t there today Lord, but You were there.

Learn the Divine skill of making God all things to thee.

He can supple thee with all; or, better still, He can be to thee instead of all.

Let me urge thee, then, to make use of thy God.

Make use of Him in prayer; go to Him often, because He is thy God.

Oh, wilt thou fail to use so great a privilege?

Fly to Him; tell Him all thy wants.

Use Him constantly by faith at all times.

If some dark providence has beclouded thee, use thy God as a “sun”;

if some strong enemy has beset thee, find in Jehovah a “shield”;

for He is a sun and a shield to His people.

If thou hast lost thy way in the mazes of life, use Him as a “guide”;

for He will direct thee.

Whatever thou art, and wherever thou art,

remember God is just what thou wantest,

and just where thou wantest

and that He can do all thou wantest!

-Charles H. Spurgeon

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 21

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Day 21

Like a stone dropped into a lake – the ripples spread out into ever widening circles.

It doesn’t just impact me, it impacts our  entire family.

It impacts our extended family.

It impacts our church family.

It impacts our friends and neighbors.

It impacts everyone whose lives he touched.

Our lives have been forever changed.

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 20

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Day 20

Two are better than one;

Because they have a good reward for their labour.

For if they fall,

The one will lift up his fellow:

But woe to him that is alone when he falleth;

For he hath not another to help him up.

Again, if two lie together,

Then they have heat:

But how can one be warm alone?

And if one prevail against him,

Two shall withstand him;

And a three-fold cord is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother,

And shall cleave unto his wife:

And they shall be one flesh.

Genesis 2:24

Have ye not read,

That He which made them at the beginning

Made them male and female,

And said,

For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother,

And shall cleave to his wife:

And they shall be one flesh?

Wherefore they are no more twain,

But one flesh.

What therefore God hath joined together,

Let not man put asunder.

Matthew 19:4-6

There were three of us in this marriage –

God – Olin – Charlene

Lord, You are who made this possible.

What You created – this family – has been torn asunder.

He was a part of me, and now he is gone.

I am left with an empty place in me.

Lord, You are the only one who can fill it.

Fill my cup, Lord

I lift it up, Lord

Come and quench this thirsting of my soul

Bread of Heaven, feed me till I want no more

Fill my cup, fill it up and make me whole

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 19

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Day 19

Go . . .  have I not sent you?  Judges 6:14

When God sent Gideon it seemed an impossible task

yet because Gideon was obedient it was accomplished.

Lord, if You lead me I will follow and watch to see Your plan unfold.

Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit. – God

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. 

Philippians 4:13

In the evening my wife died.

The next morning I did as I had been commanded.  

Ezekiel 24:18

The great God wants our conspicuous crises to be occasions of conspicuous testimony;

our seasons of darkness to be opportunities for the unveiling of the Divine.

He wants duty to shine more resplendently because of the environing shadows.

He wants tribulation only to furbish and burnish our signs.

He wants us to manifest the sweet grace of continuance

amid all the sudden and saddening upheavals of our intensely varied life.

This was the prophet’s triumph.

He made his calamity a witness to the eternal.

He made his very loneliness minister to his God.

He made his very bereavement intensify his calling.

He took up the old task, and in taking it up he glorified it.

“In the evening my wife died. The next morning I did as I had been commanded.”

The evening sorrow will come to all of us:

What shall we be found doing in the morning?

We shall have to dig graves; have burials:

How shall it be with us when the funeral is over?

J. H. Jowett

Make a pulpit of every circumstance.

Springs In The Valley

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might.

Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood,

but against principalities,

against powers,

against the rulers of the darkness of this world,

against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Ephesians 6:10-12

The battles not mine, said little David,

Lord, its thine

I’m in Your favor,

I’m giving it all to You,

I knew not what to do,

I’m so glad You let me see

That You’re really all that I need,

For the battles not mine

I give it to You

Lord its Thine.

Roderick Windham

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 18

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Day 18

The Breaking Point

On Thursday, May 15th I came down to earth. Everything I did that day seemed to accentuate the loss. So for two days I have put one foot in front of the other and pushed through with times of tears. I couldn’t write. I couldn’t share, but this morning I put on the Country’s Family reunion “Wednesday Night Prayer Meeting” video and cleared my mind. Listening to the old hymns and songs of the faith reminded me of all God has done for us and all the promises He has made us.

God reminded me of the story Catherine Marshall told of her experience when her husband, Rev. Peter Marshall died. So I went to the bookcase and found the book, Meeting God at Every Turn.

Reading her words reminded me that God hasn’t left me and that there is work to be done.

Hear is how she describes those days:

During the funeral preparations and all the myriad decisions to be made,

it was as though I were taken over and managed. In addition, a sort of

protective shield was placed over my emotions. Somehow for those days

I was lifted to a higher realm. Was this, I wondered, what it felt like

actually to be living in the kingdom of God on earth?

Then about eight days after Peter’s death, suddenly that higher realm

in which I had been so lovingly enveloped was gone, and I plummeted

to earth to stand again on feet of clay in the valley where salt tears and

loneliness and the fear of coping alone with the problems of everyday

life were all too real.

My Lord was nearby of course, ready to help me all the way. Yet I

sensed another painful but necessary growth process stretched ahead.

My experience was different in some ways,

but similar in that the Holy Spirit is ministering to me in a different way now.

Those first two weeks He carried me but now He is asking me to walk with Him.

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 17

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Day 17

. . .  to have and to hold from this day forward,

for better, for worse

for richer, for poorer

in sickness and in health

to love and to cherish

until death do us part

Lord, it is difficult to cease being a wife.

As wonderful as our marriage here on earth was,

Your words paint a different picture for eternal life.

Jesus answered and said unto them,

You do err, not knowing the scriptures,

nor the power of God.

For in the resurrection they neither marry,

nor are given in marriage,

but are as the angels of God in heaven.

Matthew 22:29-30

My imagination doesn’t cover heaven because You, O Lord,

are greater than anything that I could ever imagine.

I keep coming back to this truth:

I Must Trust!

So I trust.

I trust that however it may be,

it will be good,

because You are good.

My Journey Through The Dark Valley – Day 16

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My Song For This Day:

Lord, I have shut the door,
Speak now the word
Which in the din and throng
Could not be heard;
Hushed now my inner heart,
Whisper Thy will,
While I have come apart,
While all is still.

Lord, I have shut the door,
Here do I bow;
Speak, for my soul attent
Turns to Thee now;
Rebuke Thou what is vain,
Counsel my soul,
Thy holy will reveal,
My will control.

In this blest quietness
Clamorings cease;
Here in Thy presence dwells
Infinite peace;
Yonder, the strife and cry,
Yonder, the sin:
Lord, I have shut the door,
Thou art within!

Lord, I have shut the door,
Strengthen my heart;
Yonder awaits the task—
I share a part;
Only through grace bestowed
May I be true;
Here, while alone with Thee,
My strength renew.

William M. Runyan, 1923

Lord, This alone time with You gets me ready to face the day.

I need this quiet space – knowing that as I go about my day – You go with me.